If you have children and are getting divorced, you will need a Parenting Agreement before your divorce is finalized. You and your lawyer should make sure that the Parenting Agreement states:
- Which parent has residential custody of the child;
- Whether parents will share legal custody of the child and, if not, which parent gets sole legal custody;
- How much time the child will spend with each parent (in Illinois, parents usually prefer that the child spend one weekday evening and every other weekend with the non-residential parent);
- How child-related expenses will be shared by the parents;
- How parents will resolve conflicts; and
- Other provisions that the parents wish to add.
Also, the judge will want you to include the child-support payments in your Marital Settlement Agreement
Bitter custody battles over children are relatively common in Chicago. Parents, lawyers and judges worry about the poor children caught in the middle of the battle. Yet, viewed from another point of view, these children are so lucky. They have two parents fighting for the honor of raising them and taking care of them. Some children are not so lucky.
The Illinois Nursing Home Abuse blog has a post on a handicapped boy who died here in Chicago as result of neglect:
On May 15 a 13-year-old Illinois boy died at a University of Chicago Hospital after being brought there with very severe signs of neglect including ulcers one of which was seeping pus, a black crusted patch on his tongue, and hair, skin, and nails that were flaking and dirty.
The boy’s death has been ruled a homicide. The mother has been charged with felony neglect.
Conclusion: There are worse things than two loving parents fighting over how take care of you.
Divorce lawyers often have to explain child custody because many parents in Chicago say they want custody without knowing exactly what it is. For simplicity’s sake, child custody can be separated into four categories:
- Sole residential custody – the child lives with only one parent.
- Joint residential custody – the child lives at both parent's home (for example, one week with Mom and one week with Dad).
- Sole legal custody – only one parent makes all the decisions as to the child’s medical care, education, religion, after-school activities…etc.
- Joint legal custody – both parents must come to an agreement as before any major decision is made about the child’s medical care, education and religion…etc.
Many parents choose to mix and match sole and joint legal custody. For example, parents may agree that they will make joint decisions as to the child’s education but only one parent will have the final say as to the child's religion. On the other hand, most parents choose sole physical custody for their child because they believe that the stability of living in only one home provides the best environment for the child's development.
