Alarmists cite the increasing divorce rate as a sign that we don’t take things seriously anymore. But – I wonder – could our increased life-spans be the cause of our high divorce rate?
Although I am no historian, it seems that the “unto death do us part” made sense in the old days when people died young. It made sense back when the average lifespan was 45. Back then, it was not unusual for women to die from childbirth or men to die from tuberculosis.
Due to the high mortality rate, it would not have been uncommon for someone to reach the ripe old age of 45 and have been married three times. Back then, all you had to do was wait for death to “part you” if you didn’t like your spouse. Then – if you weren’t the dead spouse – you could proceed to marry again!
Serial monogamy – the practice of entering one monogamous relationship after another – has been historically accepted for widow(er)s. Now, through our increased lifetimes, modern humans have the option of choosing if, when and how to separate from their mates.
Not bad, huh?
Conclusion: Living longer gives us more choices.
The New York Times has a "passion test" that you can use to determine whether the romance is gone. Results range from "extremely passionate" to "extremely cool".
There are many reasons to stay in a marriage once the passion is gone. Thus – even if this were a scientific test – I would not recommend making any decisions based on "passion" alone.
Still, it might be an interesting test to take.
When I started practicing law, my boss told me "never say never” (i.e. “Judges never make bad decisions”). She said you never really know how a judge will rule. A judge’s personal views and background can sometimes shape the outcome of a case. International news underscores my boss’s point.
The recent decision by a Saudi Arabian judge to punish a rape victim seems based on the Judge’s personal views. Similarly, last year a German judge cited the Koran when denying an expedited divorce to a Muslim woman.
In the USA, this past week a judge was censured for – among other things - raising "the bond for a woman after [the Judge] was told the woman’s son had called [the Judge] an asshole outside the courtroom."
Around the world – like in the USA – you can always count unreasonable behavior from people, even when they happen to be judges. So, don’t be overconfident even if your case seems like a slam-dunk.
Disclaimer: Most judges make fair and balanced decisions based on the law.
